Some years ago when I was young and foolish, I wrote a small piece on mates. I put to paper all the names I had the pleasure of being called over the years. Some good and some bad. (Actually I have to confess I was a 50 year old “young and foolish” when I first wrote it)
Still it was a learning experience for me and also a breeding ground for thinning out the weak from the strong. The military is a wonderful place for such character building and as such I wanted to share those experiences with readers.
A copy of the article may be downloaded by clicking on: AUSSIE BLOKES STATUS AND POLITICAL CORRECTNESS IN TODAYS WORLD
A poster of the Aussie Blokes Status can also be downloaded by clicking on: AUSSIE BLOKES STATUS AND POLITICAL CORRECTNESS IN TODAYS WORLD POSTER
MORON. A bloke whose knowledge of the world came from reading comics. A sheila could be a moron at times.
NO HOPER. An intelligent bloke who does not use commonsense.
BLOODY IDIOT. A normal bloke who lacks initiative and commonsense.
DRONGO. You know the bloke to be a goose or a silly bastard
DICKHEAD. Something is wrong with this bloke but you cannot figure out what it is.
HALFWIT. Same as dickhead but he does have some knowledge
WANNABEE A delusional bloke who just didn’t have what it takes and lives in a fantasy world. Wankers, Drongos, Weasels are known to be Wannabees.
WANKER. A bloke who is kidding himself or thinks highly of himself Sheilas cannot be wankers.
STROKER. Same as wanker except I would trust him to feed the dog.
WEASEL. A gutless no good wanker, not worth urinating on even if he was on fire
SPORT. Sport A bloke you met but you would not lend your lawn mower to. A sheila can be a sport if she wasn’t to be.
ACQUAINTANCE. Acquaintance A bloke or a Sheila (woman) who you know and not sure of, for example someone who is transgender
CHAMPION. A real ignorant bloke who thinks he knows everything.
FRIEND. Friend A chap who knows you and your wife but would not trust him. He would return your lawn mower back broken.
BLOKE. It could be anyone from being a SPORT up to MATE status.Blokes are also loyal right up to your hanging and they will hold the rope for you. It will depend on your relationship. Sheilas’ cannot be blokes unless they are transgender.
FELLA. Same as BLOKE but not as trustworthy. He will not hold the rope when they hang you.
MATE. A bloke who can be relied up on to do the right thing. He may return the lawn mower back in six months.
TRUE BLUE. A combination of Bloke and may be Cobber thrown in for good luck. Normally can be relied upon to return lawn mower with petrol still in it.
DIGGER. Someone with whom you know very well and will loan you money and would return your lawnmower
COBBER. Cobber A very special person whom you trust completely and will go to war with. Always by your side.
COBBER DIGGER MATE. If you get the compliment of Cobber Digger Mate. You are held in high esteem by that person. Your blood is worth bottling.
BUDDY. If you call someone Buddy, it means you’re not a bloody Australian. This “Buddy” has somehow crept into our Aussie vocabulary and must be eradicated.
CONCLUSION. As always constructive criticism is vital if we are to be “Bloody Politically Correct” in this bloody new world of ours where we can longer call ourselves names without hurting a blokes feelings.
This is supposed to be pure Aussie humour and if I have upset anyone, then you should not be reading or complaining about such Aussie humour. It is supposed to be an indication that we can still laugh at ourselves without taking it personal. Now I know what I have just stated is like a red rag to the bull, but bring it on. I am always interested in names that may have escaped me. Remember, I take nothing personal as it helps me add to the list. Have a nice day.
Dedicated to Jeff Barrett (We served together in 6 RAR) who asked for a copy some time ago. Goodonya cobber.
Peter Adamis is a Journalist/Social Media Commentator and writer. A retired Australian military serviceman and an Industry organisational & Occupational (OHS) & Training Consultant whose interests are within the parameters of domestic and international political spectrum. An avid blogger and contributes to domestic and international community news media outlets as well as to local and Ethnic News. He holds a Bachelor of Adult Learning & Development (Monash), Grad Dip Occupational Health & Safety, (Monash), and Dip. Training & Assessment, Dip Public Administration, and Dip Frontline Management. Website: abalinx.com Contact via Email: [email protected] or via Mobile: 0481 342 791